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helenic
My new shoes from ebay, which arrived with perfect timing this morning so I could open them with the rest of my presents. They are black patent leather with an elastic strap and purple cut-out stars radiating towards the toe. It's like I got a present from the internet. Well, sort of.
Today has been beautiful, it really has. The kind of birthday I haven't had since I was small, with all my family together and no messed-up parties or drunken pulls or friends fighting with each other or my girlfriend cheating on me with my best friend in my own bed or my dad finding out I smoke weed or any of the other disasters of previous years. I'm not a success with birthday parties, in general. But today we gathered on my parents' bed in our pyjamas as per tradition, and I opened my presents and my brother brought me orange juice. And because it was that sort of birthday, I don't feel unjustified in telling you what I got:
some really good speakers with an amp for my computer, since I've pretty much replaced my CD collection with mp3s now and my old ones were terrible. Big fat basslines, here we come.
many Body Shop goodies & makeup
a self-massage thing, - wooden and roll-y with balls, it looks extremely rude
chocolate (hrmm)
some sandalwood incense and incense holder (to add to my ever-expanding collection)
a pack of absolutely beautiful notelets and cards, which you will shortly see featured in the new layout at my domain
Elizabeth on DVD
about eight art postcards (I collect postcards) including some Klee and art nouveau posters; my mum knows me too well
random stationery items
two books; For Better, For Worse by Carole Matthews and Cross Dressing by Bill Fitzhugh. I haven't heard of either of them but they look the sort of simple, amusing nonsense that would suit train journeys perfectly
a purple plastic picnic set
about ten pairs of retro stripy and patterned ankle socks, because I'm trying to start a trend with ankle socks and maryjanes
(from my brother) something called "Bop-it EXTREME" - don't ask
(from Iain) cuddly leopard toy, earrings, and the most stunning photographs of him I ever saw
The rest of the day has mostly been spent in moving furniture around (my mum bought a new desk, so I've now got hers and my brother has mine) which confused the dog tremendously; I think she thought we were moving house again. She's very insecure these days. This evening we went out and had Thai and the restaurant owner bought me a drink because they heard it was my birthday, and then we came home and watched The Importance of Bring Earnest with Rupert Everett and Colin Firth. Too many beautiful men! We drank white wine and champagne and ended up playing Bop-it EXTREME!! - which turns out to be a ridiculous stoner noise-reaction game - until I couldn't speak for laughing, tears streaming down my face. My mother was terrible at it; I am the undisputed champion.
In other news I think I have a job from the beginning of August until the end of the summer, working in the police station in Hamilton - one of the many places we used to live - as a legal secretary. It sounds better than I could have hoped for; I only hope I get it. The agency have put me forward for it, but since they asked for someone who could stay until the end of October, it's not entirely certain. (My results arrived on Thursday but didn't seem worth comment - I got a disappointing but understandable 2.2, the individual papers varying from a fail to a high first. I could have done better but I didn't exactly have an easy term, and if nothing else at least it gives me something to prove. I'm not used to not being the best; it's an odd feeling.)
I am nineteen years old.
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no subject
on 2003-06-28 05:04 pm (UTC)b. your shoes are lovely and I am jealous
c. you're brilliant, I don't think you'll have a hard time proving anything
no subject
on 2003-06-28 05:06 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Posted byno subject
on 2003-06-28 05:30 pm (UTC)b) they rule, and they fit perfectly which I didn't expect at all, although the downside is they make me feel (and act) about six years old
c) you're extremely sweet, and I hope not. But it's the summer and thou shalt not speak of work. Bah!
!!!
on 2003-06-28 05:10 pm (UTC)Re: !!!
on 2003-06-28 05:31 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-28 05:35 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-28 05:45 pm (UTC)& thankyou sweetheart :) xxx
oh, i found you again :)
on 2003-06-28 05:50 pm (UTC)Re: oh, i found you again :)
on 2003-06-29 04:10 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-28 06:03 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:13 am (UTC)(no subject)
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on 2003-06-28 06:19 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:16 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-28 07:03 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:22 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-28 07:58 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:23 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-28 08:32 pm (UTC)ps i love postcards! ive collected them from almost everywhere exciting ive been :)
xoxo]
no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:25 am (UTC)I don't collect postcards from places, but art postcards. I love those taschen books which have thirty postcards by a single artists - I have the Giger and Escher ones, and one of Art Nouveau designs. Also random arty postcards from paperchase and gift shops and art galleries. They're so cool. You can blu tack them anywhere (eg on bookshelves, chests of drawers, my computer ...) for instant decor and you can send them to people as a sort of pretty mini I'm-thinking-of-you, sort of like the postal version of a text message, only with illustration :) yeah. postcards rule. xxx
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Posted byno subject
on 2003-06-28 09:42 pm (UTC)lovely shoes btw
xxx
no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:28 am (UTC)my eyes aren't really that shade of blue. The flash made them look a lot paler. They're more a smoky blue-grey. But I was just pleased at finally having photos I didn't need to edit in photoshop to make them look better :) not even the contrast!! It's a miracle ... :)
xxx
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Posted byno subject
on 2003-06-28 10:52 pm (UTC)*hugs*
no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:29 am (UTC)hope you're well :)
xxx
no subject
on 2003-06-29 01:58 am (UTC)Also, yay Bop-It Extreme! That thing is the most annoying game in the universe, though sadly I've yet to have the opportunity of playing it as a smoking game.
I know precisely what you mean about not being the best being weird. In my pre-exam delirium I always had, just at the edge of awareness, the vague feeling that just maybe I was actually kicking ass and was just stressing too much and would get a First with no problem, because that's what I always do, right?
Not a good instinct to rely on.
no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:37 am (UTC)I got that feeling too. Just because I've never revised before, and I've always managed to pull through. And even though I was trying to make myself be appropriately scared, there was the little voice saying "well why not this time?"
Not as loud as the pretty much permanent voice telling me how fucking stupid and fat I was and how I didn't deserve to even be there and was clearly going to fail, but still. It was there.
I still can't quite believe I failed Greek. I mean I knew I'd not done enough work, but still ...! I can't be that bad - can I?
ps. you're neither old nor ugly, you daft thing
no subject
on 2003-06-29 03:08 am (UTC)and those socks and shoes are fabulous.
no subject
on 2003-06-29 04:38 am (UTC)I think so too. I'm going to start a trend - but I'll be the only one with purple cut-out stars on her shoes :D xxx
no subject
on 2003-06-29 05:29 am (UTC)Bop-it extreme sounds amazing... in fact that name reminds me of something one of my friends had a long time ago. It was this plastic game which went "bop it" or "twist it" at intervals and you had to pass it round and follow the instructions. If it is that i might have to come round and give it a trial run!
xxx
no subject
on 2003-06-29 05:56 am (UTC)Seriously, we should meet up this summer. I have a weekend free in August - shall I come down to London? we could maybe get jen and people together as well ...
xxx
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on 2003-06-29 09:00 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-29 09:26 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-29 09:39 am (UTC)And happiest of happy birthdays to you.
no subject
on 2003-06-29 09:49 am (UTC)(no subject)
Posted byno subject
on 2003-06-29 10:04 am (UTC)Well, of everything, I think the best present would have to be the lessons learnt - that you can't always be the best. Hopefully it will make the coming year a lot easier,
All the best for forever
Renee xxx
(and I'll try and spread the socks'n'MJ trend)
no subject
on 2003-06-29 10:28 am (UTC)This is very patronising of you, which I have to admit is intriguing. I probably did need humbling, you're right, but I have no doubt that next year will be unimaginably more difficult than the last one has been, both academically and personally; and in any case I'm not sure I have learned I can't always be the best. While I realise (and relish) the fact that I'm no longer in an environment where I can do well without really applying myself, I still have faith in my own academic potential. I think that is the only area of my personality, interests or abilities that I don't hold in complete contempt. The truth is I've never really tried my best at anything academic, perhaps because I never needed to, but perhaps out of a fear that when I did, I would disappoint myself. But seeing as I need a first next year to be considered for a bursary for the mPhil course I want to apply for, next year seems as good a time as any to finally stretch myself.
Besides which, I could really use the discipline.
Anyway, good to meet you, Renee. Is this a new journal, or do you not write much? I've always been interested by your comments on Alex's journal - thanks for returning it.
(no subject)
Posted bywishful thinking
on 2003-06-29 11:18 am (UTC)happy etc. xxx
Re: wishful thinking
on 2003-06-29 11:22 am (UTC)and - take care of yourself. I worry about you and that arm of yours.
xxx
no subject
on 2003-06-30 12:56 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-30 10:13 am (UTC)no subject
on 2003-06-30 07:20 am (UTC)I hope you're not too disappointed by the 2.2. As you say, it certainly is understandable. I think a lot of people find Cambridge hard to settle into academically and intellectually, as so many people are used to achieving excellent results with little effort. The crushing realisation that one is no longer The Best is the price one pays for the satisfaction of being in a truly intellectually challenging environment.
xxx
no subject
on 2003-06-30 10:17 am (UTC)argh, sorry for ranting. hope yr well :)
xxx
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